Decisions Decisions...Bingo!
Sitting here at my computer I wonder what I should do for my first few posts. I could pick anything, whatever I want to. It's kind of overwhelming to be honest; having the entirety of my twenty-six years of knowledge and life, almost half of which spent studying folk magic, and an avenue to express and share that with the world through this blog. Do I focus on Conjure in the beginning to reel in readers? Do I rant about something that spoils my milk? Decisions.
Then it hits me. its such a "Duh" moment that I almost spill my coffee. Drinking my Grande White Mocha from you know where, I realize the sad but very honest truth:
Know one in any way, at all, knows who the hell I am lol
So for my first REAL post, I'm going to tell y'all a bit about myself. This will be an expansion of my about me page, with a lot more detail. Keep in mind I don't see myself as an expert in any way, nor a professional worker. I only work for friends, family, and acquaintances, but want to share what I do know. Maybe you will relate to me in some way, or at least start to think a gay white country boy is worth listening to.
Born and raised a in a medium sized town in Ga, I was surrounded my God in the Christian context since I was born. Although we stopped going to Church when my Grandmother took ill, It left an impression on me and I counted myself among the Christian faith for years, and in a way still do.
The Baptist Church I attended as a child was in the poor neighborhood I was raised in, with all members of the community both black and white, loving and supporting one another.
When outsiders think of the deep south, they tend to shade it with a veneer of racism and nonacceptance. although this is most certainly a sad reality in an abundance places, in a lot of the poor neighborhoods and rural communities, this isn't always the case. In these places, everyone is looked down upon by the upper and other, regardless of race. we had to stick together, work hard for what we had, with little extra to spare for anything. Everyone took care of each other; Black, White, Hispanic. none of that mattered where I grew up. Its in Places like these, in modern eras, where Folk customs like Conjure thrive and grow, and are kept alive.
I remember as a young boy, seeing my grandmother, and her sister, doing odd little things all the time. The women from church would gather together sometimes after service, and talk in hushed tones about "Spirit", and "fixing" things. I picked up a lot of these ways as I grew up, not really knowing what they were until my early teens. thy were just part of life, it was what we did every day for every day issues. By the time I was about thirteen, i had developed an interest in magic from the myriad of movies and books I had, and discovered that these eccentricities and ways i grew up with were actually Conjure work. My mind exploding, i devoured everything i could from people i could talk to around town, the old men and women i knew from church. Learning tricks and workings, as well as divination in an interesting conjure centric way with both Playing Cards and Tarot My grandmother passed away when I was fifteen, most of the older members of the small church following soon after, and there were things they took with them that I never got to ask about and learn. By this time books and websites began to spring up, and I learned all I could from them, and still do. While my teachings were country and practical, old school, the information online is very different from what I learned. This more urban eclectic style doesn't always jive with me, but its all beautiful at its core.
Around age twenty I became disillusioned with my faith. I had seen and experienced so much from all manner of religions and paths that I knew in some way they were all valid and had power, not to mention being gay. Being gay was and is hard in the South, and shunning more organized religion, keeping the teachings of Christ which are beautiful no matter your faith i branched out. morphing my understanding of Spirit to accommodate the things I have seen and knew to be true, I developed my own personal path. Eventually finding the Goddess Hecate (well, Her finding me), I threw myself before her and her ways. People began to side eye me. Who is this White boy who does Hoodoo and worships a Pagan Deity? I did struggle with this for a while, but quickly got over it. Why should I abandon the beliefs and practice of my culture, simply because my spiritualty has changed? Well I decided i didn't have to. my ancestors don't seem to mind, nether does Hecate. I believe all Deity, is valid and exists. God, Hecate, Krishna; they all exist. Along with Hecate I honor my ancestors, and what I call the Great Divine, the Highest and most Pure force of Divine power. all religions have a concept similar, and this, in my way of rationalizing, is the Christian God. This doesn't make any other religion or Deity any less. I hate to use a movie reference, but its similar to the girls view of Manon from "The Craft". All the Gods and Spirits of the world are players, and spectators on a football field. The Great Divine is the bricks that make up the stadium, the hotdogs they're eating, the clothes they wear. It is the very atoms that make up their very bodies. In short, The Great Divine is what the gods are made of. Does that help? I hope so.
My spirituality is complicated, for sure, but its mine and it works for me and the people that I help. This Blog is an extension of my practice, one I am unable to do as much as I would like do to living constraints. This Blog will supplement that, and be an outlet for my work I used to do a lot more of for family and friends. I hope this was enlightening to you all, thank you for coming this blog. There will be so much more to come and I look forward to speaking some of you in comments and the like. PLEASE comment any questions you might have about this post, if you want more information on something or want me to elaborate.
Much love to you all.
Blessings +++
Blake
I love your story. The magick of the past is slowly fading as elders pass, glad to see it being kept alive.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much! I'm happy to share. and as my first official commenter, welcome :)
ReplyDeleteWow!! I got to say this is the first real blog that has captivated me! Your wording is so poetic and draws me in! Your passion just seeps through and touches my soul! I am just in awe of how in touch you are with your spirit! I love the way how you talk about the traditional ways of your practice and the new age, and how it's ok to take both and make your own! It's amazing to see your journey from the first religion you started with, to who you are today. I just know I look foreward to following your blog
ReplyDeleteOh I forgot to meantion it's also great to see someone else who is gay like me and it makes me happy to see someone I can identify with
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